Lately I’ve noticed an unexpected and not so subtle change in my attitude. I’m pretty sure I know the reason for this change but I’m not going to give voice to it so I don’t jinx it. But there it is. And it’s resulted in a kind of an awakening.
I find I am a lot more accepting. I think I might even be starting to enjoy my experiences here. Now that’s going to sound pretty weird, I know. For why on earth would I have spent nearly 4 years here NOT enjoying myself? But things have been pretty difficult for me for a variety of reasons and I’ve slugged through my life believing I have to work hard to overcome these difficulties. So facing hard times is not new to me and I’ve always had the notion that life would always be this way. But I have come to realize we do experience periods of Grace and now one of my greatest difficulties here has seemingly vanished into thin air. POOF. It’s over. And quite unexpectedly, but probably just in the knick of time, I am feeling rather happy because I was ‘this close’ to running away for good.
But run away to where? For what they say is true … ‘wherever you go, there you are.”
So what it all really boils down to is changes in me. Sure, an obstacle in my life has been removed and I’m finding life a little easier these days. But when I reflect on my situation and think about all that I’ve experienced, I realize that I have put up a lot of resistance to my situation here. And this newfound acceptance and appreciation for all the situations life throws at you is one of the great results of the time I’ve spent here in Morocco.
3 comments:
I think you've just made it through all the phases of adjusting to a new country and culture. I worked at a university and my American co-workers would stereotype the international students as chronic complainers, but in reality they were just having to learn to adjust to our culture and differences in ways of doing things. They might not have had large one-stop stores like we do here such as Wal-mart but it was cheap for them to hire servants to do everything for them instead including shopping, driving, cooking, cleaning and laundry.
Your blog has gotten really annoying in that you hint around at things, and don't give an idea of what you're really talking about. Why not say what the obstacle is? Or, if you're not going to, don't post anything at all about it.
Hi Evelyn--I'm still high from visiting you in Morocco... but whenever I read, or write, about your house, I wish it had a name. "Dar on the Derb" doesn't do it justice, but "Dar Ben Salaam" would.
Perhaps your followers would also like to read about our trip at humming-bear.blogspot.com
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